Professor Farnsworth
Professor Hubert J. Farnsworth (born April 9, 2841) is the extremely elderly proprietor of the Planet Express delivery service in the animated television series Futurama.
The only living relative of Philip J. Fry (he is his great-great-...-great-grand-nephew — though never stated, he is therefore logically the descendant of Philip's only sibling, his brother Yancy Fry, and also, via time paradox Philip J. Fry himself), the Professor is pushing the limits of even 31st century old age at about 160. The episode "A Clone of my Own" gives his birthday as April 9, 2841. Template:Spoiler
Character
The Professor roughly amounts to a mad scientist, with the same last name as television inventor Philo Farnsworth. But it is also possible that the name originates from the fictional character Jules Farnsworth mentioned in manual from the Star Control 2 video game. (The Hypno Toad is also a reference to the Star Control series.)
He has taught at Mars University and worked for Momcorp, but he currently spends his time inventing ridiculous devices and coming up with even more ridiculous missions for his crew. Whilst at Momcorp, he fell in love with the CEO - Mom, only to leave her and Momcorp when she decided to weaponize one of his creations (originally a toy). His favorite artist is Pablo Picasso.
The Professor is characterized by his catch-phrase "Good news, everyone!" frequently followed by very bad news—often one of his semi-suicidal missions. Another is his exclamation of surprise, "Sweet Zombie Jesus!", which is noted to be clumsily censored (or simply muted out) on some networks.
At 160+ years old, he is old enough to rent and purchase "ultra-porn." One frequent source of humor in the show is the Professor's amazingly advanced age, which manifests itself in senility and general physical decrepitude.
The Professor rarely worries about the safety of the crew, typically sending them on dangerous missions even when he himself realizes that they may not make it back alive.
Inventions
Professor Farnsworth is an actual tenured professor at Mars University. Most of his professional life is spent making inventions, however. Some of his notable achievements include:
- Afterburners -- Give 200% fuel efficiency.
- Albino shouting gorilla -- To shout out his love for Mom from rooftops.
- Anti-pressure pill -- a rectal suppository roughly the size of a standard pill container.
- Badass Gravity Pump -- Affixed to the Planet Express Ship and used to move stars around. Co-invention with Ethan "Bubblegum" Tate of the Globetrotter University, seems to have disappeared after its application in stopping the time-skips he created. Cost all of Earth's money to build.
- Beautiful Women- In the episode where Cubert is created ("A Clone of my Own"), Leela's video, summarising Professor Farnsworth life, claims that he designed them.
- Clon-O-Mat -- Clones organisms. Can, in some cases, also give the clone the memories of the organism from which the DNA originated.
- The Cool-O-Meter, a hand-held device which measures the coolness of whomever it is pointed at, in units of "MegaFonzies".
- Dark matter engine - 'Moves the universe around the ship instead of moving the ship through the universe', a very powerful engine indeed.
- The Death Clock -- A clock that tells the user how long they have to live when a finger is inserted. "Occasionally off by a few seconds, what with free will and all". Seems to be less reliable than the professor thinks. The death clock is a parody of the many "death clock" websites that populate the Internet.
- An array of Doomsday Machines -- "I suppose I could part with one and still be feared."
- Electric frankfurter.
- Electronium Hat -- provides intelligence to Fry's monkey roommate at Mars University by harnessing the power of sunspots to produce cognitive radiation (as opposed to the "preposterous science-fiction mumbo-jumbo" that is genetic engineering).
- F-ray -- Similar to an X-ray except it can look through anything, even metal. Uses a controlled neutrino beam in some way. It can pop balloons and blimps when pointed at them and produces harmful radiation that is known to kill sperm. "You might feel a slight stinging sensation, all of you."
- The Fing-longer -- Not actually one of the Professor's own inventions. A glove with an extended index finger, allowing the wearer to operate machinery from "great" distances. In Anthology of Interest I, he didn't really invent this, but he wishes he had using the previously mentioned What-If machine. By the time of "The Birdbot of Ice-Catraz" he has acquired one from sources unknown.
- Farnsworth's Killbots -- A range of at least one model of combat robot, which he apparently manufactures himself. His Roboticon 3003 stall claims: "Housewives prefer Farnsworth's Killbots". The neighbouring stall is "Wernstrom's Killbots", sparking an argument between the owners and causing the two killbots to show disdain for senseless aggression and go for a paddleboat ride.
- The Maternifuge -- An alien cross species genetic analyzer that spins at 10,000 RPM to determine a subject's mother. Dr. Zoidberg lives in it. "Even I laughed at me when I created this."
- Q.T. McWhiskers -- Originally envisioned by Hubert as a cat-like children's plush toy which shot rainbows out of its eyes when being petted on the head, this robot was changed by his ex-lover and CEO Mom into an eight feet tall war robot with neutron lasers in its eyes, causing Hubert to leave Momcorp and Mom (Farnsworth argued that things that were 8 feet tall were not cute).
- The first robot capable of qualifying for a boat loan.
- The Relative Box, which appears in the episode Space Pilot 3000. Fry and Professor Farnsworth use it, which proves to the Professor that Fry is his multiple-great-uncle. To use the device, two people insert one of their fingers into a hole located on either side of the box. The box makes a ding! sound to indicate that those two people are in fact related.
- The Re-animator, appearing in the Futurama (video game), able to create an exact duplicate of a person quickly upon (premature) death, requiring only the person's 'X-rays, a DNA sample and some scrapings from the inside of (person's) tennis shoes'. Resembles and functions like a giant toaster.
- Smell-o-scope -- Allows the users to smell odors from astronomically long distances ("If a dog craps anywhere in the universe, you can bet I won't be out of the loop.")
- Superhuman Mutant Basketball Team -- Instead of using accelerated growth, he harvested chronotons. The results nearly destroyed the space-time continuum. The Superhumans were nearly a success however, as they were leading the Harlem Globetrotters by six points at the half, and leading by thirty-five points with two minutes left. Fry volunteered to play for Arachneon (who was killed in a chest-mounted cannon related accident by Thorias), which led to their defeat.
- Universal translator -- Translates from any language into French, which is a dead language in the year 3000. "Unfortunately so far it only translates into an incomprehensible dead language. (Cubert speaking into translator): Hello! (Translator): Bonjour! (Professor): Crazy Gibberish!"
- What-if machine -- Answers any what-if question, accurate to within 1/10 of a plausibility unit ("That's so plausible I can't believe it!"). When used, a TV screen shows what would happen if.... It forms the basis of the two Anthology of Interest episodes and featured in issues 7 and 24 in Futurama Comics. He once cursed that it wasn't "worth the solid gold it's made out of."
- Who-ask machine -- Decides who gets to ask the What-If machine.
- A device that lets anyone sound exactly like him -- used by Dwight and Cubert to send the crew on a fake delivery to Dogdoo 8. (The universe ends at one point right after Dogdoo 7)
- An (unnamed) machine that creates glow-in-the-dark noses that can be placed on one's face. A by-product of the machine is a large amount of toxic waste. It also performs forensic analysis on pieces of paper and translates from Alienese into even more incomprehensible Galactic.("It can do other things! Why shouldn't it?")
- A box containing an alternate universe. An alternate Professor Farnsworth also created such a box containing the original Farnsworth's universe, and each Professor pulled the other's box into their own universe. Each universe now has itself contained within a box... within itself.
- A body slimming suit that allows Hermes to compete in the limbo competition in the 3004 Olympics.
- His own model of virtual reality helmets and gloves.
- A machine that scans a person and create a microscopic robotic version of the person, allowing him/her to travel to miniscule locations (e.g. within the human body), and a microscopic Planet Express ship to facilitate such travel.
Cubert
Hubert cloned himself in 2989 from skin cells on a growth on his back. The product, his 'son' Cubert, is less enthusiastic about taking over the Professor's work when he's gone. Although Cubert is an exact clone of Professor Hubert, his nose differs because he was left in a test tube for too long, causing his nose to press up against the side and deform. Cubert goes to school with Hermes' son Dwight. His name is likely a pun on the arcade game Q*Bert, as both are pronounced identically.
Production
Professor Farnsworth is voiced by Billy West, who also voices Fry, Dr. Zoidberg and Captain Zapp Brannigan. He is named after Philo Farnsworth, the inventor of the CRT television. His invention was exhibited at the 1939 World's Fair, where incidentally the General Motors stand was named 'Futurama'. The particular name Hubert J. Farnsworth is also the legal name of the character Skeeter in John Updike's 1970 novel 'Rabbit Redux'.
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